Thursday, February 9, 2012

But, isn't it Dangerous?


           A five-year-old boy walked up to me a few years back, his face gripped in seriousness. He looked up at me and said, “Brady, motorcycles are dangerous!” This fact, I'm sure, was recently revealed to him by his grown ups, and of course, it's true. I couldn't help but laugh as I told him, “Yes, they are.”
I wasn't laughing at him – I imagine I laughed like Santa Claus would laugh (if he were real, of course) if the boy had asked him “Is Christmas Busy?” In spite of my levity, the boy remained level, curious, and asked, “Then why do you do it?” He was very serious, his face bunched tight in the confusion only experienced by children who are trying to understand the paradox of adulthood. The confusion stemming from the beginnings of logic – It's dangerous. I'm not supposed to do dangerous things. Why do you do it? He might as well ask the big man in the red suit the same question, or ask it of their parents why they pretend he's real (particularly since this was at a Jewish school). Why do you do it?
           The fat man needs to leave presents as much as zombies have to eat brains and politicians have to lie. It's what makes them who they are, it's what fills their lives, it's in their nature – just as it was in the nature of this child's parents to be concerned and to teach him how to be safe.
I should clarify how enigmatic this is. Most kids upon seeing my motorcycle have a different response (even to my '78 Honda, which looks like it was stored in an Iranian mine field for 20 years.) Their eyes bulge out of their little faces - as if suddenly injected with CO2, and their chins drop to their chests uncontrollably like they've retreated to infancy for the chance to drool on themselves. They absolutely love it, and they loved it even more when I would I pop them into the saddle and hold them in place – splayed like superman in flight, chest on the tank and reaching for the controls. This sent them into ecstatic joy (the boys, anyway) causing them to poop skittles in delight for the next 15 minutes. The same thing happens to me when I enter any shop, museum or parking lot with motorcycles on display. That is in my nature.
           There's more to life than just your nature, though. It's a strange thing your nature. It's there to be embraced but also to be... controlled, mitigated – tempered. At the same time, the culture of the United States promotes celebrating your nature to the point of excess. Our advertising encourages anorexia and our stores encourage obesity. (Think cheap fatty food and electric carts.) A confusing mix. You can have either extreme. The hardest message to find is the one that endorses responsibility, moderation.
           Weight isn't the only part of the human condition the US treats strangely. As you might guess, it's our desire to be safe. I advocate safety, but I don't endorse extreme safety – culture and parenthood have changed since I was young – an inevitable side effect of time. In the 80s I was told, “Not to go in the sun for too long on the first day at the lake,” which nearly always resulted in a peeling burn. This was when SPF 8 was optional and SPF 15 reeked of overkill. In those days I roamed free in woods and nobody feared I would be eaten by a venomous bear. I even fawned over pictures those deadly two-wheeled contraptions.
We know more now, so there are more things to worry about. SPF has surpassed 60, which is still considered inadequate and often replaced (or augmented) by swimming shirt. Parasols are coming back into vogue. It's kind of like the 1920s at some beaches these days, only without the exposed shoulder. I get it. Safety. Personally, I prefer strips of gauze dipped in wax (not paraffin, because it might be carcinogenic) because It keeps the off the sun and keeps me dry (and floating) on the beach.
           Can I blame parents for being protective? No. Of course not. Can I blame people for trying to be safe? No. For being prudent? Of course not. Being safe makes sense. If you had a habit of making toast in the tub you would probably not be reading today, but, there is a fine line, and different people draw it in different places. It's summed up in a little internet gem I found a couple of weeks ago.
We avoid risks in life so we can make it safely to death.
           Now, the waters of personal philosophy and morality are dirty, turgid and confusing. There are levels of risk, and most people worry a little bit about which SPF they have and worry a lot about trying to fix breakfast in standing water. Rightly so. And, of course, there are extremes on both ends. In the Midwest “Skin Crayoning” is common enough. (No shirt, no helmet on the bike.)
           So, what is risk, what is danger? What and how much is acceptable?
I wear shorts on the beach because of (not in spite of) the sun. I like the warmth on my back, the breeze on my shoulders, hell, I like getting a tan as much as that might shock some people. But, I (try to) put on sunblock before my skin peels. I also eat potato chips. I love them – can't get enough. I can reduce a bag chips (crisps overseas) to nothing but a pile of grease (and an impending case of the trots) in under 4 minutes, and I'll do it without remorse. But, I only buy them once every other month because I know it's in my nature. A bit of moderation.
           I also like leaning into a tight curve, I like the angry growl at high revs, I like greasy hands, burns and bloody knuckles of Saturday repairs. I like motorcycles. They reach some basic part of my nature. So yeah kiddo, they're dangerous, and yes, I will continue to use them. I would prefer the wind in my hair, but I pull on my helmet before and my boots and my thick jacked before I ride. It's a compromise. I may laugh, but understand me, this is as serious as life can be. This is about understanding who you are and squeezing something out of life. It is about knowing your nature, understanding that you can be safe, but safety will only take you so far. Sometimes, you just need to lay flat on the tank and splay your arms like superman while reaching for the controls. 

29 comments:

  1. Pretty good "thought-provoker" post Brady.....as a new father, I was guilty of being over-cautious when it came to my kids....now, that I'm "seasoned", some moderation has come into play and I let them roam a bit on their own (with cellphone) and after I've retasked the nearest spy satellite to monitor them.... :)

    I think I could sum up any response I would give to those who question my risk choices: "No one, gets out of life, alive".

    dom

    Redleg's Rides

    Colorado Motorcycle Travel Examiner

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    1. Thanks a bunch Mr. Chang,

      Kids. If I ever have them, I think I will bind in bubble wrap and sunblock that could have saved Icarus. Thing is, though, the most capable kids were the ones who had to think and act for themselves. Same is true of adults I've met - how will you ever think critically if you never have to think at all? How can you decide if you want to take a risk if you don't understand the reward? I thought about using the phrase: Being born is a death sentence. I'm glad you read it in there without needing to be explicit. Because that's basically the point, right? If we pretend we're never going to go, then we're never going to live. No need.

      Brady
      Behind Bars

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  2. Great post, life without a little danger is not worth it.

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    1. Thanks George,

      I totally agree. I don't try to swim under speeding boats or stand on the top of driving cars - but the reasonable stuff is worth the risk.

      Brady
      Behind Bars - Motorcycles and Life

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  3. Bravo Brady!!

    I loved this post! Your not alone on some things you talked about. For instance, I'll match you chip for chip... after I eat a whole can of black olives, cause I love 'em so much. I try not to bring that addictive drupaceous fruit into my house to early during holidays or... they'll never make it to the relish tray!

    BTW... it is also in your nature to be entertaining and funny. Thanks for sharing your insight to life. I love visiting here.

    Lady R

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    1. Ms. R,

      I appreciate you kind words, thank you so much! Olives, huh? I think I came close to eating an entire cheese ball as a child. I'm guessing that olives, at least, have a degree of fiber. Plus, they're olives, and there is olive oil. I think even Oprah agrees that olive oil is good for you. Right? I mean... Right? (I'm trying to be supportive. I don't think it's working.)

      I'll keep trying to deliver. I'm just tickled people like to drop by.

      Brady
      Behind Bars

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  4. Brady:

    I agree, to live life to the fullest we have to balance safety with the amount of risk we are prepared to accept. As we get older and presumably wiser, we err more towards safety. I have met many people who say they would like to ride a motorcycle, but they always have an excuse as to why they can't . . .

    It's amazing what you learn on the internet. Lady R has an achilles heal, and it's Black Olives. I already know yours is Motorcycles, hope you manage to get one soon

    bob
    Riding the Wet Coast

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    1. Bobert (I almost always want to write Bobert here, maybe you don't like it, but I finally caved and just used it.)

      Anyway, Mr. Bobert:

      You have balls of steel. I have seen video of you without shoes on a motorized vehicle. I haven't gotten on any two wheeled device without shoes since I was 12 years old and nearly removed my right big toe while riding my BMX.

      Thant being said, there are people who balk at me for choosing a motorcycle instead.

      I totally understand, there have been about 1.2 million people that I've talked to who have said "Yeah, I'd LOVE to get a motorcycle, it'd make me the happiest person in the entire world... BUT..."

      We'll see about a bike in Deutschland. I'd love it, but it's in the air. I think I'll start hitting some events, though.

      Brady
      Behind Bars

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  5. Great post Brady. I've always thought of the saying: 'The minute you're born you start to die. It just takes some of us longer than others.' We will all go at some point. But how we live our lives will oftentimes help determine how long it will be before we are saying our final goodbyes.

    I remember when sunblock wasn't sunblock - it was tanning oil that was all the rage. Ahhh the 80's. I think safety has gotten a little overboard in recent years. We can only do so much to protect ourselves, but still live a full life to the best of our enjoyment, without taking away all the fun. I feel more in danger crossing the street to walk to the post office than I ever have on two wheels.

    Enough of the heavy stuff.....what really made me chuckle was your 'pooping skittles' comment. If you poop skittles when you see motorcycles on display, I bet that really cuts down on the snack budget.

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    1. Trobairitz... "really cuts down on the snack budget." ROTFLMAO!!

      I just had to come back here and tell Brady, Thanks... I've been thinking about skittle poop all morning! lol!

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    2. Trob,

      I was thinking about tanning oil when I wrote this. I worked with a woman who talked about tanning oil. She explained it to one of the younger men who started. She told him that they would lay out in oil and just bake. The next day they would peel all over. He was like, "Why on earth would you do that?" All she could say was that they looked SOOOOO good once it was settled. Different times.

      I'm glad my candy-coated poly-chromatic scatological references hit the mark. I guess you can't go wrong with good poo humor. Thanks for coming back to chime in on that one Lady R.

      Brady
      Behind Bars

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  6. Sun and potato chips. The only problem is the sun really draws the grease out and turns the chips soggy, so best not to do both at once. Just my $0.02 on how to live dangerously and enjoy it.

    Good post.

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  7. Canajun,

    Just got to eat them fast enough. Or eat them inside then jump in the pool. (Cramps be damned) Just be ready when they run through your system, they don't stop for much.

    Brady
    Behind Bars

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  8. Like a dear friend of mine used to say:

    Who wants to be the most healthy corpse in the graveyard?

    He did die of a heart attack at 54, but did he have fun until then! :)

    At 20, I rode without gear, just a leather jacket to protect me from the cold. Now at 40, I have complete gear. If I go down, I want to have good chances to be able to ride again :)

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  9. Paulo,

    I think you've got it. Occasionally I'll get on the machine without gear, but not very. Of course, some guys won't even change the spark plugs without putting on some kind of protection. I think your quote is just about perfect - I want to be able to ride again if I go down, too. Thanks for reading, man!

    Brady
    Behind Bars

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  10. For me It's about finding that happy medium - be safe but have fun. I'll be cautious, but I'm still going to ride. A friend of mine had a chance to ride helmetless in another state, and loved the wind in his hair. He always wears a helmet, but it's good to feel the wind in your hair at least once in life. :)

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    1. Bluekat,

      I have to say I feel like I'm not wearing a seat belt if I don't put on the helmet, but yeah, sometimes I do it. Minnesota is a wear what you like state, so I sometimes leave it and putter around the neighborhood. I feel bad, like I'm doing something stupid (probably because I am.) But there is nothing quite like it.

      Brady
      Behind Bars

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  11. Great post! It may be interesting to note that my wife doesn't like for me to ride, and although she worries, she doesn't say anything. However, when she thinks about our sons on two wheels, she's mad at me. (I wonder if that extends to my older son riding a human-powered two-wheeler to work every day. Nah, she probably doesn't realize how dangerous that is.)

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    1. Thanks a mill, Alan.

      I'd probably kill my kids (if I ever actually have any) if they buy a motorcycle. I waited until I was 25 - which seemed, well, almost responsible. Still, it's your job to worry and it's their job to fight, and it's also everyone's job to realize that living is more important than we often remember.

      Thanks for reading Alan,

      Brady

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  12. Love your blog-especially this post! I have been feeling the need to make the best memories I can while I'm still "here" despite the discouragement of others. It feels great living it up every moment of every day with no regrets (with minor boundaries). Others look at me and always comment how happy I am...it's called loving life! Sad that more people don't share this mentality!

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    1. NatureLvr,

      The quote from Shawshank is "Get busy livin' or get busy dyin'" isn't it? Good quote. Maybe a bit dramatic, but definitely gets the point across. There is something going around these days (and I'll bet goes back to the beginning of time) about enjoying yourself being evil. Well, that's not true, not in my opinion. I may not squeeze every drop out of every day, but I do as much as I can not to compile a bucket list. Instead, I try to just do the things worth doing. Good for you for doing the same.

      Brady
      Behind Bars

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  13. Geez, I feel late to the party. All the good comments seem to be taken. But since I'm here, oh well, here goes: Life is risky, regrets seem to last forever, and the "shoulda's, coulda's, woulda's" form the Greek chorus for our little dramas. I have a sticker on my itty bitty bike that reads, "I believe in life before death." And, I do. I believe in this with my whole heart. So, I work at managing my risks, there is no way to eliminate them; I minimize my regrets, there is no way to eliminate them; and I work at being grateful--gratitude silences the choir. Riding is the perfect laboratory for me to practice working with these three things. Riding works for me like nothing else. Yes riding is dangerous, but not riding is for me psychologically cancerous...and that's deadly.

    Great post. Thanks for thought food.
    ~Keith
    Circle Blue

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    1. Keith,

      There are a lot of quotable quotes that get tritely tossed around and, honestly, make me feel like vomiting. Facebook seems like a proving ground for many of these nuggets of nonsense.

      That being said, your sticker seems to sum up my whole philosophy in one statement. Life before death. If you avoided every danger, you might live longer, but in what form? Some pallid, thin-skinned imitation of a human? Sounds like something you might find lurking in an unexplored cave. I don't need that.

      Thanks for reading, Keith.

      Brady
      Behind Bars

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  14. Ok I'm a safety nut and I admit it but I do appreciate your philosophy, risk mellowed by precaution. Death and taxes are the two things that are guaranteed in life.
    Now as to riding without a helmet, come on guys. If you want to feel the wind in your hair go stand in front of a fan. The helmet is the precaution and no matter how short the journey riding without one is just unadulterated risk. Don’t make me write to your parents. (Joking of coarse as I don’t know their addresses).
    Brady as always a great post and the fact that I am follicularly challenged has had no influence on my point of view. ;-)

    P.S. Follicularly, a word that’s not found in any dictionary. Who would have thunk it.

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    1. Jay,

      Get a fan, huh? I'm guessing it won't come to all that for the readers of Behind Bars. I'm sure there are a few wildcats out there who enjoy their Easy Rider lifestyle, but I get the feeling that most of the readers here wear buckets when they're out. That being said, the best experience I had so far was wearing a 3/4 helmet, which was a nice compromise. I know there isn't as much jaw protection, but damn was it nice to feel some air moving. When you switch, you realize just how suffocating a full shield can be. Of course, I didn't realize my face would be exposed to the sun - didn't even occur to me after years of full face riding. Well. It was alright, but I'll probably wind up with nose cancer now. Everything is a compromise.

      I'll keep you in mind the next time my helmet is 'over there' and I want to ride across the yard.

      Brady
      Behind Bars

      And as a response to your post script, you can make up all the words you want around here.

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    2. Brady may your nose remain in its pristine state and a 3/4 helmet is better than no helmet. I'm taking the "glass is half full" approach as I try to mellow. Wish me luck.
      Itching to say something about riding across the yard to fetch a helmet instead of walking but I'm not going to. See an improvement already.
      ;-)

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  15. Dear Brady:

    This was a great sentence: "The fat man needs to leave presents as much as zombies have to eat brains and politicians have to lie." You should have put the kid in your lap and started your explanation with it.

    Then you could have said, "Danger is relative. Nothing kills more souls than first through third marriages. Unprotected sex is more dangerous than untreated drinking water in India. And great Bourbon is perhaps the most dangerous thing of all, inspiring men to do remarkably stupid things, like drinking water in India, having unprotected sex, and then marrying the object of the exercise."

    I'm sure the kid would have remembered your answer. Or you could have told the young boy, "Shut the fuck up and get lost. If you're afraid of motorcycles, then take up knitting."

    I liked this piece very much.

    Fondest regards,
    Jack/reep

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    1. Jack,

      Danger IS relative. I'm happy to let everyone make their own decisions, but I don't always understand them, and I don't understand the motivation. Sometimes, what's the point? Why not just settle into some bubble wrap and watch reruns of Oprah eating broccoli until your heart gives out?

      I'll risk the bourbon.

      Thanks for reading, Jack.

      Brady
      Behind Bars

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  16. Hi Brady! Too true, too true. But it still comes to be that everything in this world is dangerous. Driving the car to work can be dangerous. Walking on the side of the road can be dangerous. (Ask Stephen King.) Laying in bed during a rain storm can be dangerous. (Think falling trees slicing houses in half here.) it is all about mitigating risk. And I think that is what draws so many of us to each other. We talk, chat, we laugh, we share experiences. And it seems that we all agree on the important stuff. :)

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